Cow Woman

Penny amazes me with being able to take concepts and extend them to other things. She has this game she plays with us that she made up called staiming. It's a made up Penny word, but it involves doing flips over our knees. She saw the dogs jumping all over each other and she goes, "That's like when we staim. The dogs are staiming."

We had rented Toy Story some time ago and watched it multiple times before returning it. At the beginning (which is the part she's seen the most), the little boy says, "Hey, cowboy" to Woody. Penny loves to say, "Hey, Cowboy," to us and she's been calling herself a cowboy for awhile. I'm not really sure why (and I'm not sure that I agree with the decision), but Tray decided to start correcting her to say cowgirl. This evening at supper he had some water and she said, "Hey cowboy!" Tray said, "Hey, cowgirl!" Penny said, "The cowboy has some water. Some water for the cowgirl to drink." And then she turned to me in the kitchen where I was putting some things away and she goes, "and what's the cowwoman going to do?"

Montgomery Zoo!

On Sunday we took Penny to the zoo! She has several books/stories that feature zoos so she was pretty excited when I told her about it. She was so cute when we got there. She kept trying to talk to the animals and then she'd turn to me or Tray and say some variation of, "they can't talk to me," or "they can't say anything." And then when we'd leave one exhibit for the next she'd wave to the animals and call out loudly, "bye-bye flamingos," or whatever animal it was. We went into the day knowing ahead of time we were going to skip her nap. She's been skipping them on her own 4 days a week at least anyway, so we just went with it. And, in typical Penny fashion, even though she was tired from no nap and exhausted from walking around the zoo for hours and hours she stayed awake for the whole trip home from Montgomery. Her staying awake skills are enviable if not entirely endearing.

Anyway. Photos.

This is late in the day when I finally remembered I had a camera with us and started photographing. Posing with Tray by the giraffes:

One where you can actually see the giraffes. And also the big poof ball of hair she now possesses. When her hair is wet it actually hangs to her shoulder blades at least. When not wet, it curls. A lot.

She reveled in getting to walk around without having to hold our hands (unless a maintenance vehicle happened by or something). Here she is practicing her stretching, which she pronounced with a prolonged "streeeeeetch." Also: those capris are from last summer and they are still too big. Sigh.

Penny begged and begged all morning to ride the train that runs around the zoo. It costs extra so we delayed awhile before finally relenting. Also in typical Penny fashion, the object of her desire turned out to be kind of scary in practice. She didn't like the ride much, and especially did not like going through the tunnel where the other children all shouted "Woooo" joyfully whilst passing through. She is still talking about how the train was "too loud."

One thing she did like about the train: she saw the zoo playground and wanted to go there forthwith. We spent quite awhile at the playground. The zoo was packed Sunday because it was so nice outside. There were kids everywhere. Several of them spoke to her and said hi or just smiled and every time that happened she'd come report it to me breathlessly. And then she told me she was going to say hi to some kids herself. I'm not sure that she actually did it, but she had a ball at the playground. She also proved herself to be mostly fearless when it comes to the equipment. She went down the big kid slides several times, even though on the first trip down she went so fast she smacked her cheek making the turn. She didn't even cry -- though part of that is that she will not cry in front of anyone outside of her inner circle unless it is something really bad and part of that was Tray stepping in and distracting her.

Two more shots of her monkeying around on the playground:

We had a really nice family outing. It was a glorious day to revel in. We saw all kinds of animals Penny knows from books but not in real life. They have a little-bitty baby monkey that was super cute. She liked the rhinoceros and overheard a little boy tell his father that there was "a dinosaur" while he pointed to the rhinoceros. So now she's been calling them dinosaurs too. They do sort of look like that. I think it may be awhile before we go back since I think she might get more out of it when she's a bit older. Next on my list though is to take her to an aquarium. Tray and I went to the Flint Riverquarium in Albany a few years ago and really liked it. I think she'd have a blast seeing all the fish.

Things to Remember

In terms of this blog being a place for me to remember things, I wanted to write about two moments that happened over the weekend that I want to always remember. I didn't get a photograph of either one - once because I didn't have a camera and once because it isn't something I would have photographed anyway.

Friday night, the first night that Penny was sick, was a very long night. About 2 am was when she started throwing up, and she'd only slept very fitfully before that. Of course there was a lot of cleanup involved after it was over: her, me, Mr. Bear, the sheets, and etc. After we got her cleaned up, Tray held her in the recliner and read to her and sang songs while I cleaned other things. I washed my hair and I ran Mr. Bear and the sheets through the wash and the drier. During this time we were also on the phone with the nurse at the emergency room who was trying to page the doctor on call. It was probably about 3:45 or so before we were all settled down again to think about going to sleep. Anyway, eventually I took Penny from Tray and he went to bed. I read to her the entire book of stories that she loves cover to cover because she kept asking me to read the next one. When I'd finally read the very last story, I turned the lamp out and just held her there in the recliner. She cried at the thought of going back to bed, so I told her she didn't have to and rocked her a bit and she fell asleep leaning against me. Her little body was so hot in my lap, like holding a hot coal almost. I sat there at 4 in the morning holding my sleeping little girl and watching her in the light from the streetlight outside, worried to death, but also just overcome with the feeling that this is what it means to be a mother.

The other event happened on Monday. Tray worked out of town and he'd left before either she or I woke up. It was Valentine's Day, and he'd left me a present on the table. Because Penny had been sick I hadn't been anywhere to get him so much as a card. So, I decided to get Penny to help me plant some pansies by the mailbox as my present. We live on a busy thoroughfare and neither of us had had a chance to plant the pansies we'd purchased weeks ago since we didn't want to take Penny out by the road with us. I talked to her about staying right with me though and not going into the road. In order to carry the big flat of pansies, the shovel, the trowel, and the watering can as well as keeping close tabs on Penny, I loaded all of them up into her big red wagon. She had on her sun hat and her beloved blue and purple flower shirt. It took me awhile to dig up all the sod to make a flower bed, and all the while she sat in the wagon just playing with the flowers in the flat on the seat in front of her. It was such a nice day both after having been so cold recently and because she'd been so sick. I looked at her sitting in the sunshine in her red wagon seemingly surrounded by flowers and she just looked so beautiful. I'm not talking about her personal physical appearance, but more the overall scene. I would have loved to have a photograph of that moment, but it was one of those ephemeral things. Even though I don't have a photograph, it's a memory in my mind - and I hope I always remember it.

On the Mend

So going to the doctor turned out to be a moo point. (Friends jokes never get old.) She did still have a fever on Monday, but it was low enough that I figured she was getting better. She ran a low temp all day, but it was gone by last night. Moreso than the fever though, we had our daughter back. She was pleasant to be around last night: ate supper, got a bath, went to bed, etc. without a fuss, versus the monumental battles over every little thing that have characterized the last few days of illness.
Tray and I both feel emotionally drained by the last few days. I get excuses from students (particularly in my online class) all the time about how they didn't get this or that done because their son/daughter was sick. Now I fully know what that means.
I'm so glad she's better.

Spare Moment

Those are few and far between around here. Penny has been really sick since waking up with a fever Friday morning. I think she was probably sick Thursday evening b/c she was very hyper at gymnastics, which was noticeably uncharacteristic. She has no other symptoms besides the fever. She threw up Friday night (once*), but I think that was a result of the fever and not the other way around.

*and by "once" I mean one episode of continuous vomiting until she had nothing left.

Since then the fever has been up and down, up at night and down during the day. I did take her to the doctor Saturday morning even though everyone told me it was just a virus. And it was, just a virus. This is the first time she's really been sick though aside from that one ear infection early on so I'm definitely guilty of the first-time-mom syndrome. Anyway, they said to bring her back if it wasn't gone by Monday. But now I don't know if that means if she wakes up tomorrow with a fever that I should take her, or wait to see if it goes away on Monday and then take her Tuesday. Anyway. Turns out sick Penny at night is even more of a handful than not-sick Penny at night. Who'd a' thunk it? The sweet, extended hugs and snuggles I like, the hour-long crying jags, not so much.

Memories

One of today's Motherlode posts is about memories that children make. The dad suddenly realizes that he has no memories before the age of 4 and since his two children are younger than that, he sets out to create a day that will stick -- only to learn that what you try to make stick doesn't and things you would rather not stick do. It's a pretty funny post, but also an idea I've long given consideration.

For me, thinking about this started with an article I read when I was still pregnant with Penny. In it, the author confessed that he had but one memory of his father who died when the author was 4. He remembered his father cutting meat for him on his plate. That's it. His own twin sons had just turned 4 and the point of his article was a confession of how he'd been obsessed with worrying about the things his sons might remember of him.

I wouldn't say that I'm obsessed with the concept, but it does make me sad sometimes that if something happened to me not just tomorrow, but any time in the next year to year and a half, Penny would likely have little to no memory of me. That's awful to think about. To know that I fed her, bathed her, hugged her, read to her, loved her every day of her life to this point and she won't remember a single moment of this time when she's older. Or maybe through the vagaries of the brain, she'll remember one random snapshot of a thing. Or maybe she'll remember exactly one thing - me yelling at her. These are morbid thoughts, I know. But on a different level, they truly encapsulate parenting.

For my own part, I have a fuzzy memory of holding my baby brother in my lap (with a grown up seated on either side of me) which means I had to have been around two. I also remember being at a golf course with one of those big plastic toddler golf clubs and my mom was there holding Chris in her arms so, again, maybe 2 or 3 years old. I also distinctly remember being knocked into a swimming pool when I was 3 or so. I also remember some of the subsequent swimming lessons. Now that I'm considering things I think that I have a fair amount of memories from the 3 to 4 year age range, and I definitely remember kindergarden pretty well. But aside from one or two fuzzy memories, not much from the age Penny is now.

Broken Record

Penny's been on nap strike for the last three days. Usually that means she'll at least go to sleep at a semi-decent time, but two nights ago it was no nap and still not falling asleep until after 10. And then she's been waking up an hour earlier than normal too. Ugh! Sometimes I look with such jealousy at all those moms out there whose kids apparently go to bed at like 8 o'clock, lay down in bed and stay there of their own volition and sleep until time to get up. Granted, I have never met such a mom in real life, but I am so jealous of this imaginary person. Lol.

The Other Gymnastics

Another post to compensate for the downer of last one. Since starting up the dance class, Penny has been begging to go to "the other gymnastics" at the rec center. We'd stopped going because Tray and I felt like it was relatively expensive to just run around and play on trampolines. She begged and begged though, and finally I just said ok. So went back last Thursday and again tonight. She really likes it there. I'm more and more thinking that we might not stick with the dance class and instead go back to the more free-range gymnastics. Two classes each week (in other words, both dance and gymnastics) seems like a lot. I don't like the idea of scheduling activities for kids Penny's age at all, but there aren't many options for social interaction in Troy other than doing that. She really does seem to like gymnastics and is already starting in on how she doesn't want to go back to the dance class. I am worried that if I pull her out of it though that she'll change her mind and want to go back again. I feel like we should at least give it another shot. I guess it's a silly thing to be worrying about, but I just don't know how far to push her. Should I encourage her to stick with it even if she keeps saying she doesn't like it (but has fun once she gets there and gets into it), or should I just drop it since she's obviously still so little?

Assignments

In response to Chris's comment that I post some of what my student's found out for their assignments, I am doing just that. The original assignment was given out on the first full day of class after we'd watched The Story of Stuff (I swear I do more than show videos). Anyway, the assignment was to pick three things, a food item, a cosmetics/toiletry item, and an electronic device that they use everyday and tell me how it is made, where (at least one of) the components comes from, and talk about any social/moral/political issues associated with those items. One of the big points made in The Story of Stuff is that the true cost of an item is in no way reflected by its purchase price. I wanted them to discuss the external costs of items they use everyday.

Most everybody said cell phone or iPod for their electronic device. That was intentional on my part because I kind of wanted them to focus on coltan and the concept of blood minerals with regard to the ongoing conflict in the Democratic Republic of Congo. I could have come out and asked, "how many women have been raped so you can play your PlayStation?," but I figured this was more subtle.

The cosmetics/toiletry category was kind of a wash (see what I did there?) in that they didn't find much. Most chose to right about dangerous working conditions, particularly from inhaling ingredients when shampoos and soaps are manufactured. I was kind of hoping some of them would write about the necessity of cosmetics in the first place. One of the UN's favorite statistics is this: it would take $6 billion per year (in addition to current expenditures) to provide basic education for every person in the developing world; $8 billion per year is spent on cosmetics in the US alone. The assignment really was worded more like where does my stuff come from though, so I considered their answers to be pretty good.

The food items were easier. I'd given them some good starting points: chocolate, coffee, bananas, tomatoes. All food items with significant social issues. One of my students is from Cote d'Ivoire, so he wrote about chocolate. Nestle and Mars control most of the chocolate market, and Ivory Coast is the largest supplier of cocoa. The cocoa is exported to other countries where it is turned into chocolate. Most people in Ivory Coast have never even tasted chocolate (just as most people in rural Latin America have never drunk coffee). Many of the workers on cocoa plantations are young, under 14 years old, and many are working in either bonded labor or outright slave conditions. Nestle* says, "not our problem. We're just buying a product." Seriously. They said that. The cocoa being exported out of the Ivory Coast now is funding the sitting President and his supporters, while the man who was actually elected has been unable to take over the presidency. Burkina Faso has been allowing the cocoa to come through their country and around to ports in Togo (since the Ivory Coast ports are in the south in the areas held by the opposition). They are exacting taxes for this service. Burkina Faso + the legitimate government of Ivory Coast = not friends. There is all out war between the two factions in Ivory Coast. Widespread violence, slave labor, exploitation of the resource (since most of the profits accrue to the chocolate producers rather than the cocoa growers) means that the cost of a candy bar at 3/$1 or whatever those cute little heart shaped boxes of Valentines chocolates sell for these days in no way captures the true cost of those items.

*Nestle is, by the way, no stranger to controversy. The Nestle boycott is one of the longest running boycotts around. In the 70s and 80s, they were accused of giving away free samples of baby formula in developing countries - just enough so that women would use it, their milk would dry up and they'd have to buy it. Since most of them couldn't afford to buy it, they'd buy what they could and dilute it way down such that many babies died from malnutrition - and many others died or were sickened because of course the water supplies are often unsafe. Those practices aren't ongoing anymore, but there is an international treaty against the marketing of baby formula (which the US did not sign, obviously, or I wouldn't have gotten my free can of formula on the way out the hospital door) and Nestle has been caught continuing to advertise it in other countries.

On a related note, milk was another favorite topic that they chose to write about. As we saw in the Life and Debt movie, the Jamaican dairy industry has all but collapsed because of imported powdered milk from the US (it's reconstituted in Jamaica and sold just like fresh). The US government and the EU government heavily subsidize dairy farmers so our dairy products are insanely cheap. In the EU's case, 60% cheaper than what it actually costs to produce. There's no way developing nations can compete with that.

Anyway, all in all I think it was a good assignment that got them thinking about the "true" cost of things that we all buy. There's so much more they/I could have written about - sugar, coffee, tomatoes, bananas, cotton, beef, etc., etc. It's sometimes paralyzing to think about it all. Local Farmer's Markets!!

Dance Class Feb.1

Today's dance class went marginally better than last week. Penny asked several times not to go, but then she got excited about putting her dance clothes on, and I also bribed her with another trip to the drugstore ice cream counter if she would participate. When we got there, she would not let go of me to go into the classroom so I went with her. I sat with her on her sticker (her spot, basically) and tried to encourage her to dance. The dances that they do are kids songs that have motions to them like If You're Happy and You Know It or The Green Grass Grew All Around. We do those songs at home, so I tried to show her that she knew how to dance along. I had limited success, but she did do some of the motions. Then they lined up to bunny hop across the floor to Little Bunny Foofoo (one of my favorite kid's songs). I told her to go get in line and she did, and she hopped across the floor and back when it was her turn. Most of the other girls in her class are already 3 and somewhat more used to being around each other, so they horse around and knock into one another and kept jostling Penny which I don't think that she liked. However, by the time they were done hopping back and forth, I had edged toward the door and when they sat down on the balance beam (on the floor) to await their turns at rolling down the mat, I slipped out. As far as I know she was okay after that. She has been excitedly practicing jumping on one foot all evening. She can't actually jump on one foot yet (and considering she only learned to jump on two feet a couple months ago, I'm not surprised), but she is giving it her best shot. So, I think we'll go back again next week and continue to see how it goes. They measured her for her Spring recital costume today, so I'm thinking there is going to have to be a decision about whether to stay in or not pretty soon.

Not About Penny

This is one of those not-about-Penny posts that I occasionally engage in. Today in my Economic Geography class we finished watching a movie called "Life and Debt." It is about the effects of International Monetary Fund (IMF) loans and other policies on Jamaica. The movie is a bit hostile to tourists, but otherwise is a pretty good movie to explain concepts like globalization, free trade, and structural adjustment programs. Basically, if you're interested in learning more about how the lesser developed countries of the world came to be in such dire straits when it comes to debt, this is the movie for you. But this post isn't about the movie, really. I am posting because I had such a good time teaching this stuff to my class. They talked about things! And I'd had them do an assignment to pick out three items that they use everyday and find out how they are made and where (at least one of) the ingredients come from. They were supposed to use the information to talk about how the costs of items are externalized - meaning, yes, we pay $6 for that radio, but that price in no way captures the true cost of the item in terms of labor and environment and health, etc. I was bracing myself for some not so great essays, but they are wonderful! I am riding a high that comes from having taught somebody something, and I just had to write about it.

I am a dork. That is all. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.